SHE is...

She is elemental, like water or fire, earth and wind. There’s an ancient, raw energy about Her, impossible to confine or define. She moves through everything—sometimes a force, sometimes the faintest whisper—always present, never quite the same.

She can come in like giant waves off the ocean, towering over, crashing down and pulling everything under into the depths of the unknown. There are days when Her power is overwhelming, relentless, impossible to resist. Or gently ebbing and flowing like sly swaying hips of a mother’s gentle dance as She tries to rock her infant unknowingly into slumber. Sometimes She is subtle, almost soothing—a soft rhythm, a quiet pull, a lullaby sung by the sea.

The next time I meet Her She is raging like a forest fire that is being fed by dry grasses and strong winds, breeding sparks that dance and jump across the sky, burning all the tree tops and leaving piles of ash in her wake. Then she seems to settle, slowly burning out, becoming contained and briefly harnessed, offering a gentle warmth and comfort that feels like memories on the whispers of shared stories, all wrapped around me like a heavy blanket on a cool summer’s evening. It’s as though She exists in a cycle—destruction, transformation, and renewal. In Her fierce moments, She consumes everything, leaving only memories and lessons behind, yet when She quiets, she becomes a source of comfort, the gentle heat that soothes as much as it scorches.

She is elemental… energetically not of this world and yet totally unexplainably a part of this world. They call Her “Grief”. 

She slips in and out of existence, shaping and shifting the landscape of my soul. She is the force that cannot be contained, an energy that both transcends and anchors me to reality.

I see Her in Raven. Dark and mysterious and yet cunning, and incredibly wise… Raven’s presence reminds me that Grief has many faces—sometimes She is a shadow, sometimes a guide, always teaching me things I never wanted to learn. The wisdom She carries is hidden, like secrets in the night, and sometimes only revealed when I need it most. Raven, with her perplexing flight and piercing gaze, embodies the complexity of Grief—a reminder that what is unknown can also transform, that the darkness harbors wisdom.

Her wisdom is beyond our comprehension…wisdom that is elemental, like earth, rock and soil that has been in its place for thousands of years, Air-wind that has moved through, across, over and under all things everywhere since the beginning…earth, wind, water and fire…just there—elemental…witnessing, knowing, feeding, carving, moving, birthing, destroying, creating. Grief is not simply sadness; She is as old as time itself, as steadfast as the land, as restless as the wind. Her lessons are carved into the world, shaping us whether we resist or accept her presence.

The wisdom Grief has transcends knowing…I think that’s why I don’t understand her…and yet I feel such a strong connection to her qualities. They surround me like family. Mother Earth, Brother Wind, Sister Water, and Father Fire. It’s as though my body recognizes that I, too, came from the stars…That I am elemental… and I’m here for my Remembering. When Grief visits, she doesn’t simply hurt me—she roots me in the world and connects me to everything that came before. It’s as though each element calls to me, reminding me of my place in the cosmos, urging me to remember and to honor what I’ve lost and what I still hold.

She comes and goes… and has, my whole life.  She is my Remembering…Grief…my reminder that this, as I know it, is all temporary. That one day, I too will be met by the elements that make up all things—that one day they will carry me into the swaying hips of Mother Earth's gentle dance where I too will meet slumber’s embrace. Grief’s visits are unpredictable, sometimes brief, sometimes lingering. Yet each time She arrives, She reminds me of impermanence, of the way everything eventually becomes part of the earth, of the dance that continues long after we’ve gone.

She is elemental! I’ve met Her, I don’t understand Her, I don’t like Her. I’m getting to know Her; I’m building a relationship with Her…I respect Her—She is a part of me. We are grief.

 In learning to live alongside Her, I discover that Grief is not only about pain but about remembrance, connection, and growth. She is the force that binds us to the cycles of nature, the stories of our ancestors, and to our own hearts. As much as I resist Her, I find myself shaped by Her presence. Grief is not an end, but a companion—a reminder that to feel deeply is to BE alive, and that the journey through loss is also a journey towards understanding, healing, and A remembering that connects all things to the stars from which we came. The elements that bind us to the parameters of possibility connect us to the process of becoming!  We are shaped by the winds, soothed by the waters, warmed by the fires, anchored by the earth, and guided by the wisdom of Raven, who sees what we cannot and carries us forward into our remembering! She is elemental. She is Grief, as am I...

With love, kindness and appreciation; 

xoxox

J